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This causes the skin around the anus to become inflamed, leading to thickening and ultimately itching or discomfort with sex. Lube it up generously with silicone toys, use water-based lubeand slowly slide it in. Your body has an impulsive reaction of tightening your muscles and clenching when something feels uncomfortable. Read Next. Sex, particularly analis all in the mind. This can fill the rectum with liquid stool, running the risk that you will have a messy experience. Enter your email to subscribe to our newsletter.